Friday, July 03, 2015

Betrayal can be a wakeup call.

With all the lessons I have learnt, life reveals more tests, no one is immune to life lessons whether you are 15 or 90. There is a constant motion of learning and going through challenges and triumphs. 

It’s like we in our own “class” in the School of Life. 

Betrayal is part of human nature. 

You can be betrayed by anyone at any time. From your best friend to a work colleague. Betrayal is something no one can predict.

Sometimes our internal nature gives us a red flag about this person, but we shrug it off and give the person the benefit of the doubt or we simply go into denial mode. 

Sometimes there is no sign that a certain person will ever betray us, and when they do it shatters us. You are left reeling why would this person/s betray you, is it your fault, or is a result of something you did or didn’t do to make them commit such an act.

Betrayal can have many motives.  Instead of pulling it apart, on why they did this and pull yourself to yourself. People will let you down, when the chips are down on the table, they reveal their true natures. I have been asking myself why people would deceive, lie, manipulate, and make a bad situation worse. 

Every single action from the past shapes who you are right now. You may not have been so suspicious early in life but people and situations mould you into this person. I am still na├»ve and I give people the benefit of the doubt. But when you get a blade between your shoulder when you least expect it, you realise not everyone has your best interest at heart. 

Facing a betrayal is definitely saddening because trust, emotions are completely shattered in the most unexpected way. Not everyone wants to see people happy or content, they believe it’s easy to divide and conquer. There is always scars left from betrayal, not to mention the emotional impact on the person betrayed. The cut is deeper depending on how deep an emotional tie you had with the person, and how much trust you afforded them. 

I am a true Scorpio when it comes to someone betraying me, the relationship will never be the same, I will not easily trust again. Trust is fragile and can be lost instantly. 

The betrayer used my blind spot and wounded me. I will never allow that person in that blind spot again, in fact I will keep them at bay in clear view. For many people, when they are betrayed they go on a campaign of vengeance or bringing the person to book for their actions. I don’t waste any more of my energies on this person. People will fail us all the time or maybe I failed someone else in some way. 

No matter how sensitive I might want to be it is part of our humanness, our life lesson. I need to own the hurt and shock of the betrayal and use it as an opportunity to know myself better and heal from our own pasts. This could be the turning point in your life, it may leave you feeling vulnerable, but it could also allow you to make some positive changes. 

There is no birth of consciousness without pain.

I believe the best in people, but as Maya Angelou said: "When people show you who they are, believe them." When a person displays to you, ‘I’m a deceptive person,’ or ‘I have the ability to cause havoc in your life” or ‘I display one face to you but behind your back I have another.’ Believe them! 

You should not dwell on the betrayal that you can see. The truly terrifying betrayal is that which lies utterly hidden from your eyes. ~ Aizen Sosuke